break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
