How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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