I must be too annoying 4 u.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
