I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
