i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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