guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize