What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Randomize
