Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
