I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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