Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
