i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
