you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
