So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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