just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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