I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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