PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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