bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
