the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Randomize