just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
third nipple confirmed
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize