I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
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