it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
