I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
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The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
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If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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