I want to stick my p in your. b.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
