i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.