I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
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