Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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