Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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