If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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