These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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