I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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