Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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