There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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