the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
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he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
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