where does the pee come out of this thing
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize