So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
