This girl is more easily done than said...
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
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Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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