Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I need moral support for this bender
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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