i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
I did not marry a roomba.
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