I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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