I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize