i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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