I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I got inside last night via doggy door
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
