BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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