This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
you're hired as official boob wrangler
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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