im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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