six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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