Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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