Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize