I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize