fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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